Chris and Dan come into a little money after some great-granduncle dies and leaves them his dilapidated mansion built on an ancient oil well. They sell it for some sweet cash and invest in a little start-up that makes
… to a vampire. Seriously, there’s this Vermont vampire that’s been chasing Chris around and Dan’s had a bunch of neighbor kids playing ding-dong ditch every night this week. Two birds, one stone.
Chris and Dan try to get hip with the kids. The police are called. Nothing bad happens, but it was pretty embarrassing.
Chris runs into thus guy with an arrow in his head and get hold of some of the good stuff. It’s a wild, wild drug. Very dangerous for kids though, because they get really small.
Chris and Dan spend the day at a My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic convention learning everything they can about My Little Pony- so that they can pull off the heist of the century
Don’t eat old food guys. Lay off it. Just avoid food more than like a month or two old. Seriously.
Fuckin’ history man. All that old shit that happened before.
Dan digs several ditches but finds nothing but fossilized dinosaur dung.
“Happy New Year,” Chris said. “New Year’s was three and a half months ago,” Dan replied. “Shut up,” Chris said.